Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Askeland SBL Paper Accepted

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My paper, 'Was the New Testament originally written in Coptic?', has been accepted to the New Testament Textual Criticism section for SBL 2009. Of course, the answer to this question is no. However, the Coptic versions are our best hope for rebuilding the Latin autographs of the New Testament texts (from which the Greek translations were made) which predate the Coptic translations by only one (or maybe two) decades. After evaluating my dialectal-stemmata with a Tau-cubed equation, I have shown with a 87% likelihood that the Coptic translations were created by an Alexandrian -- perhaps the apologist Apollos from the Acts narrative. I will be showing some clips from Mel Gibson's Passion of the Christ to buttress my case that Latin was extensively used in the Eastern half of the Roman empire.
[This was posted on April Fools' Day, 2009.]

12 comments

  1. Wow, I can't wait to hear this paper :-)

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  2. Should it be, "from which the *Coptic* translations were made"?

    J.C.B.

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  3. This post was posted on April 1st, right?

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  4. John: "This post was posted on April 1st, right?"

    Yes ; )

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  5. Did you say that the autographs were in Latin?

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  6. As powerful as the χ² test is, the τ³ must be even more so.

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  7. Oops, I read that entirely too early in the morning and didn't realize it was April 1!

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  8. Gratias agere Christianus! I knew all along that the NT autographs were in Latin--the one true ecclesiastical language! When will this groundbreaking paradigm-shifting research be published?

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  9. MF: "When will this groundbreaking paradigm-shifting research be published?"

    I am currently in talks with The Weekly World News. I thought it best to go straight to a popular outlet with a discovery of this sort.

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  10. Next we here that the NT was written in Doric, rewritten in Ionic, and then converted to Attic ...

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  11. .. "here" -> "read here" ..

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  12. See also here: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/advertisement_feature/indiana_jones/article2351750.ece

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